Hiring the Evil Bald Genius
If you are reading this page then it’s highly likely you need help with your marketing strategy and implementation and you think the Evil Bald Genius might be the one to help you.
And… maybe, maybe not.
It all depends — on me and on you, the kind of business you’re in, and how much you’re willing to invest in getting your marketing and copy right.
You also need to understand right upfront I am, to the best of my knowledge, the most highly paid copywriter in Europe. If you are looking to buy on price alone, then, I am definitely not the right person for you to be talking to.
You will be aware of the value of direct response marketing and copywriting, but you’ll also realise neither I nor any other direct response copywriter is a magician and there are at least three factors in your marketing ranking higher than the copy: your list, the relationship you have with it, and your offer.
You will also realise direct response copywriters who claim they can “compel people to buy” are lying to you (if they could do this, then they’d be selling multi-million dollar yachts to rich oil Sheiks, not writing copy for clients, yes?).
Because of that, you’ll either be marketing savvy yourself or will be willing to take general advice and direction from me on your entire strategy. Direct response copywriting is not my only skill – first and foremost I am a marketer. World-class direct response copywriting is not possible without a deep and wide understanding of marketing.
My job is to make you money, not make you feel good about yourself by simply giving approval to your existing ideas and plans.
I am your trusted expert advisor, not your hired hand. For this reason, you will also be prepared to invest a substantial amount of money in your project.
But let’s not get ahead of ourselves, because you have FOUR options and some options are easier for you to exercise than others.
Option 1: Video Critique
This is the simplest option and it works like this: you send me your marketing piece or link to your website and I’ll do a full 30- to 60-minute video critique where I’ll dig deep into the structure, content, style and design of your work and share with you my insights, observations and opinions of it, as well as giving you extremely powerful tips, ideas, and strategies for improving it.
A recent client said this about my critique:
Christian Simpson, www.christian-simpson.com
While you might not get me “one on one”, the time I’ll spend and the detail I’ll go into make this one of the most challenging things I do — and it’s yours for just £297.
Option 2: Telephone Consulting
Your second your option is a one-hour telephone consultation with a 30-minute follow up four weeks later. While I cannot guarantee you the same results, here’s what one client said after a she had a consultation with me (and, incidentally, she is still with me, in my Inner Circle and as a regular purchaser of my products and programmes — this is not a coincidence).
“I’ve had 133% increase in the number of sales in that last 26 days and my average $/sale has increased by 24%. My conversion rate has increased by 362% to a respectable 1.82% and the optimal version has a 2.3% conversion rate!”
You’ve been on my mind as my taguchi test winds down for the squeeze page. The sales page test is about 1/3 of the way completed. And I’ve got to tell you Jon, as we say over here in California – You ROCK Dude! The test results are – as Y’all say over there- smashing!Before your review, my optins were pathetic, at 1.16% and Sales conversion rates were even more depressing at 0.4% in a good month.
Taking all of your suggestions and testing all of the stuff you recommended testing has made a huge difference just in the testing period. I can’t wait to get the optimized versions out there!
Even the test, with it’s 18 versions of the changes you suggested, some with less than optimal percentages, blew away my previous opt in numbers at 8.41% overall and a rocking 14.02% for the optimal version.
That’s a blistering 1108% improvement for the optimal version. I’m now getting more opt-ins PER DAY than I was previously getting in an ENTIRE MONTH.
My list has grown over 250% in the 27 days since I began testing!
As I said, the changes you suggested for the sales letter are still being tested, but so far early results look equally Wonderful.
I’ve had 133% increase in the number of sales in that last 26 days and my average $/sale has increased by 24%. My conversion rate has increased by 362% to a respectable 1.82% and the optimal version has a 2.3% conversion rate.
Taguchi testing is a beautiful thing, but without your priceless feedback, I’d have had nothing worth testing.
You da man, Jon.
Thanks a ton (tonne?)
Renee Johnson de Morales
Your investment for a one-hour telephone consultation with the 30-minute follow-up is just £1,497.
Important: You need to book these at least 14 days in advance and to get any specific questions and preparatory material to me no less than 7 days before we speak. You also get the chance for just one of these. Once you’ve done one, if you still want more one-on-one time from me, then the only choice is a full day’s consulting (see below).
Option 3: Email Domination
If you’ve been following my work for any length of time you’ll know I am a big proponent of Email Marketing. I don’t think anyone should be using it as their only means of getting business and making sales because that’s just asking for trouble.
But the fact is, it’s one of the easiest ways to enjoy a huge bump in sales almost overnight. I have loads of documented stories of clients who have started emailing their lists the Evil Bald Genius Way and have has increases in sales of over 1,000% (that is not a typo).
So, here’s the deal — take it or leave it.
Your initial investment is £5,000. This is for an initial consultation period plus your first 20 emails. I’ll help you with the landing pages and the sales pages with critiques, suggestions and advice, but I am not writing them for you. That’s an order of magnitude up the scale of what you get from me.
From then on it’s £3,000 a month for 20 emails, and you commit to sticking to the diet of daily emails for at least 6 months and you follow my advice to the letter. Start hemming and hawing and thinking you can just go with what’s comfortable and easy and you’re out. Bearing in mind my own daily emails are worth over €10,000 a month, this is a steal.
Fair Warning: I have only three openings for Email Domination and one of them is already taken.
Option 4: In-Person Consulting
This is the option giving you the most immediate access to me and so comes with a commensurate fee. It’s also a prerequisite for applying to join my exclusive Private Clients’ List.
Our day together comprises 8 hours consulting plus a one-hour break for lunch, and other breaks as necessary. How you spend your time with me and exactly what we talk about is largely up to you, but my personal aim is to leave you with a full marketing strategy for your business, from lead generation to long-term relationship, you can take away and put to work immediately.
We will meet either in your office or in my office here in Ireland.
Your investment for a full day’s consulting with me is £10,000 if we meet here in Cork, or £12,500 plus expenses if we meet in your office.
You need to book consulting days at least 30 days in advance and to get any specific questions and preparatory material to me no less than 14 days before we meet.
Important note: even if I agree to a day’s consulting with you this is not a guarantee or a promise I will be working on implementing your project with you. I am extremely busy and very much in demand, and there is currently a 12-week lead-time before I can even begin looking at any new projects. Moreover, my fees are extremely high and very few business owners have the commitment to make an investment of this size in their business.
So while I will help you find competent professionals to help you implement the marketing strategy we will have in place by the end of our day together, you need to proceed on the understanding you will very likely NOT be hiring me, personally, to work with you on your project. It’s not impossible, but I don’t want you making any assumptions and then being disappointed.
If you’ve got this far and you’re still keen to work with me, then by all means get in touch. Please give me some details about your project (a URL is fine, too), and the best email address for me to contact you on.
I’ll get back to you within 48 business hours, with an indication of whether or not I think me and my skills are a good match for you and your project.
Please remember I’m in the GMT timezone, so if you’re in the US I’m at least 5 hours ahead of you.